The College Life

Wow...yea I totally slack on this blog thing. Even though I keep saying "I promise I'll keep up with it!" I'm not gonna lie...I probably never will XD.

SO updates! Today is Dan and I's 2 year anniversary! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY. Too bad I'm not there with him :(. I'm trying to make it home for Halloween...but again I'm not gonna lie. I kinda really really want to stay here at JMU for Halloween. There's so many fun things to do I just wanna experience all that my Freshmen year and not have to go home :P. I would love to go home at any other time besides Halloween though :P Technically I don't even have a ride home for Halloween weekend so we'll see what happens.

Also, apparently there's a Bucket list here of the things you have to do at JMU before you graduate and one thing is to find the tunnels! KELLIE AND I ARE DETERMINED TO FIND THESE TUNNELS. O! I don't think I've talked about Kellie in here. Kellie is not my roommate, she's my hallmate (but might as well be my roommate lol) she's my bff here at JMU :). I love her and she's so silly so we can be stupid together XD. It's awesome.

BIG NEWS. I joined a sorority! I'm in Kappa Alpha Theta. Apparently it was the first sorority in the U.S. and it's a lot of fun so far :) I went camping this weekend with them and our counselor was a British guy! AWESOME!! I ate dinner with a theta girl yesterday, and today I'm eating lunch with a theta girl. You never eat alone in a sorority which is nice. I signed up to live in the house next year so hopefully i get it!

There's one thing I didn't like about coming to college. High school in NO WAY prepares you for college tests or life. I got a C on my first french test which I was really upset about. But I changed my study habits and got a high B on my second :). I had a midterm yesterday that went pretty well :) But I have an art history midterm tomorrow that I'm not too excited about :P. Gonna study ALL day for it :P.

Well I'm going to leave my blog on that note and hopefully...maybe...post at least one other time this month XD

caryatid

There's so much more to come!

This summer has still been incredible! Not a day goes by without my doing something! I had one day to myself and I couldn't bare it anymore so I called up someone and made plans XD. I love being alone but now it just get's boring when I'm sitting at home lol.

I have at least 2 days off a week now! They hired a new snowgirl and I'm doing both snow and produce. Delia's offered me a job at their store. I REALLY REALLY wanted to accept it...but I want to stay with Farmer John's for one more summer and then go intern somewhere or do retail work.

College seems to be coming faster than I thought it would. I was trying to make plans with people but turns out I'm literally busy every single day/weekend in august. IT'S HORRIBLE (but fun :) I want to make time to hang out with everyone like Vero, Amber, and Taylor. I VILL TRY!

Veronica's Birthday is tomorrow!!! I feel bad that Cole is leaving her a few days after her birthday...that SUCKS. I was so happy Cole and her got together because they seemed to be a good match ^__^. WELL Britt's been talking to me about breaking up with Mason because he's selfish and drinks and partys everyday. So she did that yesterday XD.She's a funny one. I hope she's happier without him like she thinks she'll be.

For me, Dan and I are doing fine. I'm really proud of him for getting a job! He works at Canine Country Club now with Casey and he takes care of Dogs alllll day XD. PERFECT JOB FOR HIM!

In the weeks ahead I'm looking forward for Otakon 2010!!! I have everything for my Freya outfit! It's amazing and I look awesome! I'm also going to bring a lighter dress to cosplay as Chi. I figure Bonnie would want a day as Freya and a day as Chi so we can switch off XD IT WILL BE FUN!. Nic is Hideki, Molly is Yuzuki, and Mat is Minoru! We have a cute little Chobits group going! YAY! This will most likely be the best con I have been to yet! I WILL BUY A PLUSHIE THIS YEAR!

ALSO I'm looking forward to going to THE JERSEY SHOREEEEEE with Dan XD. I'm so excited to act like a Guidette XD. Dan rolls his eyes at me because he says that OC, NJ is like a family town not a Guido town...O WELL. CHRISIE'S THE NEW SITUATION BIATCHH. ^_^.

I saw Inception last night and it was the best movie I have seen since Moulin Rouge. My eyes were constantly glued to the screen and the ENDING! was FANTASTIC!! I love everything about that movie and the way it was shot was genius! I bet Christopher Nolan took ten years to write that damn thing! The movie made me think of Architecture again. I've been thinking of good careers and Architect was one I wanted to try years ago...nahhh I don't want to be an architect XD. I'LL BE AN ASSASIN! lolzzz

Well Hopefully I'll actually stick with this blog...I'll try!

caryatid

Summer thus far

MY greatest apologies for the...month long wait :/. There just hasn't been any time (nor computer) for me to update this blog. FRST I'll cover Graduation...

Graduation almost turned into a family crisis -_-. My Dad had decided to invite his gf Daniella. I only have 8 tickets, Daniella would've been the ninth person...See where I'm going? Mom and Dad had a huge fight, so i gave up and asked Vero for an extra ticket to make everyone shut the hell up and happy. She agreed, fortunately, and crisis was averted ^_^ Thank You veronica, I owe you BIGTIME! lol.

Next was Sen1or Week! GREAT TIME. Was staying with Mandi, Sophie, and Amber. Hung out with Vero, Will, Taylor, and Cole most of the time down there. I'm really happy about everything that happened at Senior Week :) It was a time for me to get a taste for what life will be like in College...minus the beach lol.

After Sen10r Week were tons of grad parties, work, and teachers befriending me(or accepting my friend requests) on facebook XD. It's funny that Dan, Eric, and I went to the bar CastleBay and met up with Tedford, Greco, and Butler to watch Tedfords fiance perform. It was a great night though ^_^. Even though I don't do much else but work, I'm having a great Summer. I have good hours. I always have money on me. And I'm just having a great time. One time in particular that I'm not too proud of :P is Mandi's grad party :P.

I didn't intend to get smashed at Mandi's Grad party, I only thought I would get a little tipsy like those nights at Sen10r week :P. WELL I was wrong. I decided to drink a bottle of gin...idk why, it was there, I wanted to try it, and it was good lol. I can't really remember that night too well. But I know one thing, Dan told me I kept repeating myself and people thought I was really annoying. I ABSOLUTELY hate it when people think of/or call me annoying. In middle school, that's all everyone thought of me and in Highschool I was trying to change that and I thought I had. I guess not when I'm drunk -_- I was really upset afterwards because I feel like people won't like me if I act annoying at all, like I used to. Idk how to explain it. Just that I get real upset when I'm annoying...that sounds stupid but whatever :P.

Well besides taht the past two night have been fireworks on the bay! We went to the Kent Narrow Firework on Friday, and last night we went to see the Rock Hall fireworks. They were both real nice but I'm most excited about tonight because it's brittany's 4th of July party. I'm going to buy some glow sticks, and partttttyyyy and parttttty and partttty lol. Paige will be there too I'm happy ^_^.

I'll try to update my bloggy more :P. I apologize for neglecting you bloggy.

caryatid

I'm Not Calling You A Liar

Why do people feel the need to lie to me to protect me? Keeping me from the truth isn't going to make things better, I ALWAYS FIND OUT. So why not just be upfront with me? In the words of Flo "I'm not calling you liar, just don't lie to me." I would really appreciate it if I'm given the truth 24/7 because I don't want a false perspective, I want the real deal. I want to know the bad, the good, the heartbreaking, the evil, the love. I want to know it all. I don't need blinders.

Now that that's off my chest I'm here to say I HAVE FIVE HIGH SCHOOL DAYS LEFT! It's crazy to think about (especially since I have a two page paper due...) and Prom is on Saturday, I have a final on Tuesday, Graduation is a week away and then I'm off to SENIOR WEEK. Mandi, Amber, and Sophie are going to be the best people to go with! We will have a blast! I know it ^__^.

Prom Promise was yesterday. I think it went really well and impacted a lot of kids. People said Mr. Kerr's speech was the one that made them tear up. It was really scary being in the car when they had to pull off the roof and bust the windshield. Pretending to be dead is harder than it looks! All the wounds looked real and I walked around school with it on until I had to go to work. Everyone was asking me what I did to myself XD.

I've been working almost every day lately and have had NO time for practicing ITS stuff. I'm in a dance with Wade. The Little Mermaid! :D. And I'm also supposed to be in a skit with Derrick as a homeschooled boy XD. I'm excited for that one even though I haven't memorized it yet...It'll all work out ^__^.

I'll have to start blogging. Once Wednesday comes along I'll start blogging more...or maybe not until after Senior Week...We'll figure it our :)

P.S. flying through the Sookie Stackhouse books! Onto Number 6! :D loving it. Sookie and I must be the same person.
caryatid

So Unfortunate :(

I have to work at 12, so I'm just blogging about whats been going on lately. Well first off our One-Act won! :D Which is exciting and I'm very happy about that. We get to go on to QAC one acts :).

Secondly, I just found out the date my Prom dress is being shipped...May 28th. AFTER PROM. I'm trying to see if I can have it come any sooner. But if I can't have it come then I'll have to cancel the order and go dress shopping in Virginia. I'm so upset about this. I calculated the date my dress would come and it should be here before prom. I'm so upset and I just really want to find a way to get THAT dress :(. It's really unfortunate because my family spent so much money on it (money we didn't have) just so i could be happy and look pretty. Now I feel like it's all going to waste. I'm just still so upset and I want to cry. I'm praying that there's a way to get this dress! I feel so selfish for asking to order that dress now. But at the time it felt so good and right to be buying it. sigh, win some you lose some.

Well since I have to work soon I'll have to put my mind on other things. I PRAY IT COMES before prom and fits me perfectly!

AP test next week, wish me luck?

caryatid

My Aching Tentacles

Feet and back are hurting but i'm still loving my job :). Working at Farmer John's is going to get me so buff! I have a full day Saturday from 8:30am until close! BOY IS THAT LONG, hopefully Dan comes to visit :). Apparently Snow girls get good tips so I'm hoping that's true on Saturday. Today was a crappy tip day :P.

School works been kinda eh. I get it done, just sometimes not on time...especially for Trig. Ap classes I've got it down but Trig is just so bothersome. And pointless for things i need to do in life :P.

Cary's making some pizza, and I just heard the finish thing ring :D YUM.

I SAT IN GUM TODAY. Completely disgusting; Lyndee found it on me XD. We were laughing like hyenas lol. Might have found my outfit for the one-act. It's going well :D. I'm a bit intimated by Iris and Lyndee since they usually get leads, and I've never gotten anything :P. I'm more hoping that I learn from them, and I think I have :D.

PROM TICKETS ARE 75 DOLLARS WTH?! Apparently there's a dinner and then a dance, it starts at 6 and ends at 12...SIX HOURS AT A PROM?! Don't think that's going to happen :P. Well maybe, ya never know. I know before prom I'm going to Paige's with Dan, but after prom I really want to party! I hope someone invites me to one! :D or maybe I'll have one of my own :D. I can't wait for my dress to come in! I wanna try it on right now :)

Today at work, a lady ordering her snowball asked me if I was on ANTM. LOLOLOL She thought I looked just like the red haired girl that just won, I get so flattered when people tell me that! I am blessed, but I had to work hard to look this way :P. I get angry when people think that I'm naturally like this, when really I have to work my butt off! (not so much anymore, but before I did) After you get to your goal weight it's just so much easier to keep it. I lost all the weight almost 4 years ago and I am so glad! :D

Books: finished Living Dead in Dallas, now onto Club Dead.

caryatid

Farmer John's!

Favourite Florence song of the moment:
There is love in your body but you can't get it out
It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth
Sticks to your tongue and it shows on your face that
The sweetest of words have the bitterest taste

I'll be working at Farmer John's Produce stand for the Summer! I'm really excited about this because the people there seem really friendly, and although I would like to work in retail I think that this will be better for me. The Gap called me back today about an interview, and I just called them back and declined. I thought that I would want to work at Gap more...but turns out I'm not feeling that way at all! When I went to the Gap the people in there didn't look very happy. At Farmer John's everyone was so nice! and Friendly! And I'll be working with people I know and that go to our school! So I'm feeling a lot better about working at Farmer John's.

I do feel bad though, I have a lot of things going on this Summer that I'll have to tell them about. Like Senior week, Graduation, prom, one-acts, NC with Dan, Otakon, etc. Hopefully that's it...I don't want to not be able to ever work lol! What's going to be on my mind is snowballs and vegetables! YEEEHAW...cowboy?

ANYWAY! Ordering my pretty pink prom Dress this week and super excited! Yes, it's so important the word "Dress" needs to be capitalized. lol.

Someone I've been admiring lately has been Paige. I think she is just such a true kind-hearted person. She is so sweet and today, she gave Dan and I little gifts from the Florida! HOW SWEET?! She's a cutie :) and I do miss hanging out with her. That's why before Prom Dan and I are going to :D.

MY 18TH BDAY PARTY THIS FRIDAY! YAY! I'm pretty dang excited for it! I haven't thrown myself a bday party since middle school! But the past 2 years I've had surprise partys so that's fun too :).

OFFICIALLY DECIDED A COLLEGE! James Madison University will be honored to see my amazing self walk onto their campus to study in the fall! LOL, I am completely totally not into myself that much XD. I'm just so happy that things are looking up when they weren't looking that way last week :P. THANK YOU GOD! PRAISE THE LORD! HALLELUJAH!

scholarships to do, tata for now!

caryatid

Traveling Endlessly

Yesterday my family came over for Easter. I've always likes Easter just because of the colours and food :). But this year my family was pestering me about college decisions and Prom stuff. And then they were pestering my Mom about a Wedding Dress! Saying things like "You will NOT look good in that one Kim!". I was like "really? You're her mother and you're telling her THAT". They should of said things in a nicer way :(. My Mom already has enough appearance issues, it's awesome that you're adding another one Grandma! :P. sigh. I can't do anything about her mindset though. She acts like I'm the light of the world...which kind of scares me. I mean I like that she doesn't pester me too much, but it's just weird having her be so...nice? to me. Idk what it is, it's like she treats me like God when I don' deserve it. And seeing her treat her daughter like filth makes me feel horrible! I think I'm over-exaggerating this a bit too much, but I don't know any other way to explain how Grandma acts :P. Don't get me wrong she's a sweet lady, it's just when she wants things to go her way...ooooo they better go her way :P.

I'm actually liking the Sun this year :D. I go outside from time to time and just lay down and sunbathe :). It feels really good. I want a little tan for prom, just some colour on me since I picked out my dress! It's a light pink chiffon dress with lace underneath and a slit up the leg, it has cap sleeves going off the shoulders and a little ruffle of flowers on the top. I'M SO EXCITED FOR IT! I have to order it online though :). It's not as expensive as I thought It would be :).

WELL I've found where I'm officially staying for Sen10r week :D. It's with Mandi, Sophie, and Amber :). I need to get that job at The Gap, Walgreens, or Village Bakery so I can pay for everything I wanna do this summer :P. Like Otakon, Sen10r Week, NC with Dan, possibly visit Lily in Cape Cod, and Disney World with Dad. I am going to be so busy this summer I don't know if I can keep a job :( I hope I will be able to though :P.

COLLEGE DECISIONS AHHHH, that is what my mind has been worrying about for awhile. Now that I know all the schools I've gotten into I'm narrowing them down. My top two are JMU and MMC. I think I wrote that in the last blog. O, I didn't get into William and Mary unfortunately :P. ahh well, you win some you lose some :P. My Aunt Shannon brought up to me "How does Dan feel about you going away to college" And I guess I don't really know how he feels, we don't really talk about it. I know that he thinks I'm going to find a new boy in college (which won't happen, I'm not the stupid one *cough cough*). And I know he really wanted me to go to Drexel because it's in Philadelphia where Nic's going to be and I guess Dan is going to try to go to school up there too. I should ask him what he's been thinking about all this college stuff :).

Currently reading Pretties by Scott Westerfield. It's a good series, starts with Uglies :)

caryatid

Not My Cup Of Tea

WOOO!! I got into James Madison University! And after my weekend in New Jersey have found out I also got into Amber's one-act called "Not My Cup Of Tea." It's so funny! My name is Emmie and I'm brainless XD. I LOVE IT. Iris is my sister, Jessica. And Lyndee is my Mama! Dan also got into a one-act as the Chickenman...I can't wait to see that one lol.

Things are looking up! I'm really glad I took a risk and tried out even though I was worried of rejection :P. Because it paid off! Now I'm waiting for William and Mary and they should come in this week, AHHHHHH SO EXCITED FOR THAT TOO. It would be such a blessing to get into that fantastic college :). PRAISE THE LORD I GOT INTO JMU, GMU, MMC, and Drexel! W&M is just my number one. Of course it would come last! lol.

I'm kinda worried about Otakon this year, I don't think I'll be able to go :P. But I'm nott too worried about it. My priorities are One-Acts, Prom, and Sen10r Week right now lol. Dan's Dad invited me to go to North Carolina with them July 4th week. My Mom said I could so that'll be fun! :D

SPRING BREAK STARTS FRIDAY! :D So far I have plans to go to a concert on April 5th to see Florence and the Machine! April 10th for the Cherry Blossom Festival! And April 16th is my BIRTHDAY! the big 18! I wanna have a party for it :D...but I don't know what yet...I've planned the cake I want though! I want a cloud cake! it's going to be so cute! And I'm going out to Dinner that night and YAY SO EXCITING :D.

Today in AP Lang we talked about the film The Graduate. I really liked that movie, and Dr.Wolff asked us about if we think we're "Drifters". I said that even though I have an idea of what I'm doing with my life, and so does my family and friends, that I'm still a drifter because I don't know exactly what will happen to me. And I don't even know what I'll be studying yet in college so YIKES! I need to definitely get on that :P.

Time for scholarships!

caryatid

Sweeter than Heaven, and Hotter than Hell.

Literally all I've been listening to for the past FOUR days has been Florence and the Machine. I. Can't. Stop. Any other bands I listen to now sound like crap compared to Florence and the Machine. They are seriously my all time favourite band.

Well besides that little obsession, the Musical went well. Wasn't as fun as the other ones, but still special since it was the first time we sold out since Joseph. And It's my last high school musical :). I didn't cry at the Cast party (which wasn't as fun as i thought it'd be :P) One-Acts are coming up and I'm going to audition for them! First time auditioning for something...again! lol, i'm excited. But Senior year hasn't really hit me yet :P. Like I won't be doing this stuff at all next year. I'll have my own life, and I'll be able to do pretty much whatever I want. IT ALL SOUNDS SO FOREIGN.

I'm still prom dress shopping. I have a few dresses I really like online, and they're in my price range so we'll see ^__^. I'm really excited about Prom! I want to look the prettiest! :D

Last Thursday I hung out with Amber and Veronica, we walked down the Jetty and took some cool pictures. We also went to 711...where I was asked to the movies...by someone i don't know. Anyway, after that wwe went to Terrapin Park and met up with Sam, Kyle, Nolan, and Jack. Dylan Luke, and TJ were there too...but we didn't hang out with them. It was fun, and I LOVE THAT VERO AND SAM ARE TOGETHER NOW!!! SO CUTE! :D. Cameron's a shithead...that's all i have to say about him :P. It was my Dad's bday! And Mike's bday! WEIRD.

Friday was the Cast Party...which I've already explained wasn't that great :P. I was insulted by Reed, but he didn't mean to be insulting. He just thought calling me "fieriest crotch" was funny. It's not. Anyway, everyone else was insulted too so it wasn't that big of a D.

Saturday was Molly's photoshoot. I was Little Red Riding Hood. I thought it would be a more formal kind of photoshoot, but it really wasn't. I thought Molly would be more into it and get different angles and poses, but whatevs. It was still a lot of fun hanging out with everyone and FREE FOOD! LOL My Dad came down that day as well. We ate food at Harris'. I ate some shrimp because I was still full from Molly's. That night I went to Downtown Annapolis with Dan and Eric and Ken. It was COLD. I didn't think it would be so I didn't bring a jacket. BAD IDEA :P. Ice Cream was good though :).

Sunday I went to the Mall with Casey and Helena, bought two pairs of much needed shoes and saw Alice in Wonderland. That was a great movie! I was not expecting it to be good but it really was amazing! I loved it! I think it might be a new favourite movie :).

Now were onto today, Monday March 22nd 2010 lol. Today is my Mom's 44th birthday :). Well so far I've applied to the Gap outlet and bought her a shirt. We're planning on eating dinner at Rustico's, and i was going to hang out with Eric but he hasn't texted me so :P. Dan got his phone taken away -_- stupidhead :P.

Still reading A Passage to India. I like it more now. The idea that everyone is involved in a bad situation or a good one intrigues me. So does the different perspectives.

Making a PBIS video for French. Really fun :D

caryatid

CRIKEY

It's been a loooong time mates! Lol channeling my inner Steve Irwin. Anyway, the Musical is coming along...better than I thought, sure some scenes sound awful but at least it looks cool :D. Dan's little sister, Mckenzie, gave me these animal bracelets THEY ARE SO NEAT! And entertaining, I have an Elephant and a Cat!

Well last week took FOREVER to get through :P, and then the weekend flew by so fast, this morning I woke up thinking "Where did it all go?!"

Today was bright and sunny, and made me feel pretty good :D. Also new season of Gossip Girl tonight! And I finished the first season of True Blood, can't wait for season two :).

I don't have much to say today except that I've discovered the theory of existentialism...or is it a philosophy? I'm not sure which but I do like the idea. Dr.Wolff can explain it far better than I ever could. So I won't even try XD. Google it? :)

I feel like many happy days are on their way ^__^

caryatid

Sundays

I love coming to Blogger on Sundays because of Post Secret. Even though I don't have many secrets, I still like reading the other peoples. I'm not sure why though. I guess I like the artsy postcards, sometimes the secrets really shock me and make me feel a lot better about myself :/ that's kinda sad to think I guess.

Well yesterday was an all day Q2Q. But apprently we got done early? SCORE, I still stayed til almost 5 because Dan was chit chatting with people. But that's ok, I enjoyed it. And When I got home I ran! I almost ran the entire trail! It's my goal to run it all the way. But It felt good and I'll start running more on nice days ^__^. Then I watched the beginning of 500 Days of Summer, but I wasn't able to finish it because Becky called me and asked if I wanted to come over and pick out our outfits for Hooverville! I was excited :). It was fun, we stopped by Mrs. Darlene's house and Mrs. Zimmerman's and they said we looked better than the actual Hooverville people XD. I can't wait to be in the background. It's gonna be hilarious XD. Then Veronica came over Becky's after work and I saw that she was talking to Dan. I like that Dan likes to help people. sigh, I just can't trust him as much as I thought I could. I'm sorry Dan I really want to, but I still have that "worried" feeling. I don't know how I can get rid of it.

I still wish I could talk about everything and yell at him about how I feel. I don't think I ever told him that. I still want to talk about it, but I think we waited too long. I don't think I'd have anything to say, I'd really have to think about it now since I've kinda tried to put it in the "forget about this" zone. It doesn't stay there though. I'm glad it doesn't. I want to remember.

Today's been a really pensive day. This whole week has been. I want a job more than anything right now. I'm gonna apply to Walgreens ^__^. Maybe I'll do well there.

caryatid

It's like trying to pull open a rosebud

Lately, I've been starting to catch up on my reading! After I finished Portrait of a Lady I read Things Held Dear, Downtown Owl, Blood and Chocolate, and now I'm reading The Lightning Thief. It feels good to get all my reading done :).I went to the Library and checked out six books. All about different things. The one I'm most excited to read is Dune. I feel like it's a mix between Star Wars and Lord of the Rings.

ANYWAY, today I woke up at 7:10 am ON A SATURDAY to do the dance for NYC. It's a really cute dance and I'm glad I'm in it, I just wish I were in other things too :P. The musical's coming along nicer than I thought. Although I hate the outfits XD We have to wear the "We're in the Money" outfits they used for 42nd street :P. It's ridiculous XD and we look like elves instead of Rockettes.

This past week has gone by fast. Every day at school we've had a delay, it's nicer that way a mon avis. French class is fun, we're reading Le Petit Prince. I LOVE IT. The drawings are funny XD. Nothing's been on my mind lately, like I can't think very well this week. sighsighsigh. I went to Zumba for the first time on Thursday and it was a blast! I went with Courtney and it's basically jumping around, shaking your butt, and dancing to hip hop music XD. I LOVED IT!

Tonight Veronica and I are having an old-fashioned sleepover ^___^. I haven't had an official sleepover in a while. Last time was with Casey during December? Gosh, I used to have them once a week. It's a little upsetting, but I don't miss it too too much. I just miss the entertainment. I feel like all my life is at the moment is college, schoolwork, hanging out with Dan, and the musical :P.

caryatid

I've got a thousand opinions

Listening to Kate Nash's "Mouthwash". Great song :). Anyway I found some quotes from The Portrait of a Lady that i really liked. I don't think they'd make much sense to someone who hasn't read the book yet, but I'm still putting them up here anyway. Seriously, go listen to Kate Nash's "Mouthwash" ^__^.

"The truth of things, their mutual relations, their meaning, and for the most part their horror, rose before her like an architectural vastness."
- I really like this simile because it's Henry James commenting on the experience of finally knowing the truth of things. We all go on about our lives without knowing the exact truth of everything. We're ignorant and naive. Everyone has a secret, and when you finally learn about that secret, it's like an "architectural vastness". Those two words are exactly how I feel when I learn the truth. THE EXACT WAY. I never had a word for it, but now I do. Thank you Henry James.

"It was a proof of strength--it was a proof that she should someday be happy again. it couldn't be that she was to live only to suffer; she was still young, after all, and a great many things might happen to her yet."
- This relates to the way I think of suffering because when a horrible thing happens, I try to be optimistic and think,"this won't last for long, I'll get over it and move on. I will have an amazing life." But the next quote that comes right after this is like a "BUT"

"Then she wondered if it were so vain and stupid to think well of herself. When had it ever been a guarantee to be valuable? Was not all history full of destruction of precious things?"
- I'm very doubting as well. I just liked how this came right after the quote above.

"Don't question your conscious so much, it will get out of tune like a strummed piano. Keep it for great occasions. Don't try so much to form your character--it's like trying to pull open a rosebud. Live as you like best and your character will form itself."
- Advice from Ralph to Isabel. This quote is like saying, "Don't try to hard" or "Just let the good times roll" or "Just be yourself." I personally like it because it's really great advice! And I liked the simile with the piano and rosebud :).

"Why should I be so afraid of not doing right? As if the it mattered to the world whether I did right or wrong!"
- I can be self-conscious, and sometimes I tell myself this just so I can get through something. I'm just always on edge about what people will think about me. I feel like I can relate to Isabel a lot..

"Jealously is a symptom of happiness"
-I think this to be completely true. At first I did not understand this quote at all. But jealously really is a symptom of happiness. If you're jealous of someone that's hanging around your boyfriend then you must be in love! And if you aren't jealous...then you probably aren't truly in love with them. When I first started dating Dan he would always ask me if I was jealous of anyone and I would always say "nope, I trust you". HA. Anyway, that started to change, and I became jealous of others. And this was around the time I first told him I love him. So I completely believe that jealousy is a symptom of happiness.

Looking at what I wrote and trying to explain why I chose these quote makes me DESPISE the way I write. I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT. I have these thoughts in my head that completely make sense, and when I try to get it out on paper or talk it out...it just doesn't work or sound the same way. UGH this is a huge problem of mine and it hasn't always been this way. I remember a time when I used to be AWESOME and I could speak beautifully. I have no idea what happened -_- sigh.

I've got nostalgic pavements
I've got familiar faces
I've got mixed up memories
and I've got favourite places

This is my face
I've got a thousand opinions
and not enough time to explain

This is my brain
it's tortuous analytical thoughts
make me go insane

caryatid

Valentine's Day

Last night was Melissa's party! I'm really glad I was able to go to it this year because I had missed her 16th birthday to go to the Hyatt with Paige, Catherine, and Brittany. Wow, it's kinda hard to believe that was all the way back in 2008. Good year. Kinda...The day after i got back from the Hyatt I planned on going skiing with the church. It was a blast! But when I got home...a few hours later Dave and my Mom got into a huge fight. It was screaming/yelling/crying/throwing...just really loud. I had to go to my room and Cary wasn't there. He was at Tyler's or something. But we all went to sleep and the next day I woke up and they were at it again. Then, he left. Packed up all his things, broke their wedding picture, and left. He barely said goodbye to me. I hate him. He broke my heart. And of course my mom's. Ha I had convinced myself it was all my Mom's fault when it happened :P. It wasn't, I just wanted someone to blame. Dave had left us lots of times before, I think the most was 5. But he always came back, the first 5 times I thought he wouldn't ever come back, but he always did. This time I convinced myself that he WOULD come back...I really wish I didn't, because he never did come back. He talked to me the first few months...barely. I guess it just hurt too much and then he stopped. And I haven't heard from him since. I really miss him. I don't know why this all came out on Valentines Day, but this is just what I was thinking of as I went to sleep last night. I think he did this right after Valentines Day. Even though I said I hate him, I really don't, I love him a lot still. And I just hate what he did.

Changing Subject. Well, I made Melissa this really cute card XD and everyone made fun of it...but for fun, like they were laughing with me...I hope. And after most everyone left, itw as just Brittany, Dakota, Amber, Alex, Melissa, Mandi, Jen, and I. We were like an Old Ladies Bookclub XD. It was hilarious!! I don't think we ever stopped laughing! Even throughout the Time Traveler's Wife we laughed XD. It was ridiculous but really really fun. I wish I could have stayed longer, but my mom wanted me home. I hope to hang out with everyone again sometime ^__^.

Well, for Valentines Day today I should be hanging out with Dan sometime...lol. I don't really know when yet. I wanted to this morning, but I was off schedule. I'm really happy I'm still with Dan. I love him so much! And anything he could ever do wouldn't change my mind. ^__^.

caryatid

Snow Week!

Dang we have off ALL WEEK LONG. This is good for me :D, I have a paper due whenever I get back to school that I have yet to start on XD. LOL. That's not funny...Anyway, today I decided to look up student life at MMC and what I found made me wanna go there even more! I really think that's where I should be :D I told my Mom that I have 2 friends that go there that went to KIHS and now that she knows people from my school are going there she feels better about it XD.
When I was younger I always dreamed of living in NYC but never thought it could ever happen. Now that I have the opportunity to, I feel so EXCITED. Right now I feel like I AM going to MMC come this fall! I know I'm not yet, but it just feels like it when I research the school :). And It feels good. Living there would give me so many more opportunities that I wouldn't have living anywhere else.
ANYWAY, this snow is starting to get realllll old. Especially since I don't have any snow clothes (IT NEVER SNOWS HERE!). My Grandad seems to think that Maryland is a really cold place to live and that we're used to this kind of snow XD He should know that isn't true since he lived in Virginia like forever XD. I guess he forgot. Old peopleeee lol.
Annie is gonna be SO BAD. With all these days off NYC practice has been canceled and it's apparenlty "The biggest part of the show" LAME FAIL SHIT FUCK ASS DICK BLAH. I hate the musical :P
Right now Dan and Jimmy are writing a story for Blogger? But I'm not allowed to read it -_-. DETERMINED TO FIND IT!

caryatid

Obsessed

Well, not exactly obsessed but I was a HUGE fan of this model, Gemma Ward. She was what I wanted to be when I was younger (as in middle school) and I wanted to look exactly like her, act exactly like her, and do what she does. I really just wished I was her. LOL Once I got into high school I just never really looked her up anymore in magazines, I kinda gave up on fashion because my family told me to give up on it, that it wasn't something I could actually succeed in. Now I know they were wrong, but it's already too late for me I think :P.
ANYWAY, so today I was like "HMM, I wonder what work Gemma's been doing lately" Come to find out she hasn't done anything since 2008! Because she was Heath Ledger's girlfriend and after he died she just stopped working, and gained some weight (I mean she looks healthy, just not modely anymore. yaknow?). It made me realize how much I've missed! I still know some things about fashion but NOTHING about the people behind it all. I'm gonna start working on that again XD. O! And I was trying on different outfits today that would look interesting together...I guess they would be considered "INDIE" but to me they're just cute! :D So imma wear em to school ASAP.
Damn all this snow, I was really looking forward to Valentines day but now we have school the day after? :P SUCKS. Anyway, whenever I look through a magazine or editorial, I always get inspired to start working on new outfits XD. I can't wait to buy loads of magazines once I have some moulaaa.

caryatid

Why do I do this to myself?

I need to stop. It only hurts, and I don't know what satisfaction it will give me. But I feel the need to be satisfied.
This is a really vague blog today. It's meant to be though. I don't feel like rewriting the past.

caryatid

Hmm..

I don't think I fully explained my story in the last blog. I wanted to say something about the friends I have right now; I do think that we will be friends beyond college (like Amber, Eric, Nic, Dan, Veronica, hopefully Derrick, Casey, etc..). But I was just talking about the past and how it has lead up to this moment in my life :).
Just thought I'd acknowledge that piece of information I left out ^_^

caryatid

Catching Up

It was really nice hanging out with Nic today. I feel like I really needed that, and I just love catching up with people. There was rarely a pause in the conversation XD We both had a lot to say and I miss that. Having someone you can tell everything to.
I was telling Dan the other night that I've never really had a long-time best friend. Like most people have friends that they've known since elementary school. For me, my friends have only been constant for at the most 4 years. I believe it went Jerrica, then Maddie, then Britt and Lily. I've had other friends along the way that I consider my best friends too, but these 4 were like my family. Now I rarely talk to any of them. I just really miss my girl nights where we could go out and do the stupidest things but have the best time :).
I don't think I feel any different from someone who's had a friend for their whole life, I just think it would be really nice to have that. Someone you can trust no matter what happens. That's what I give to my friends. I give them all my trust, I don't believe I have ever broken someone's trust before. People have broken mine, but if you're my friend and I love you...no matter what you do...even if you murder someone, or hurt me in the worst possible way you could, I'll always forgive you (never forget though). I don't think that makes me weak at all. I think it makes me stronger. It shows that I have faith in people, and most of the time that's what people need. Everyone needs someone that believes in them. And right now, I don't think I have that.
Thank you blog for making me realize what I need: someone that can believe and rely on me. <3

caryatid

Feeling Trapped

Today I received another acceptance letter, from George Mason University, I was happy...my mother was ecstatic. This is THEE SCHOOL she wants me to go to. I honestly don't really like the school that much. It's supposed to be a good school...but it's in the area where I grew up, I don't wanna go back there, and there's a large student body there, I want to go to a small school like...o idk Marymount Manhatten: One of the schools my family pretty much forbids me from going to -_-. Although I got in with a scholarship, unlike with George Mason.
I overheard my Mom telling my Grandma today that I got into George Mason but that I don't wanna go there. My Grandmother pretty much told my Mom that I had to go there, and that there was no other option. It's close to them, so they can keep an eye on me. I wanted to SCREAM. I HATE THAT EVERYTHING GETS DECIDED FOR ME. This will not be their decision, IT IS MINE. Although they're family and helping me out with this...I will leave them if I have to. I want to be able to do what I want, and George Mason doesn't offer me that. George Mason keeps me trapped.
I feel like a prisoner to my family. I have to do everything within their qualifications. I can't even wear the shoes I want without them criticizing me or yelling at me to go wear something else! I may be sounding a bit ridiculous, but that's what they're doing to me. It really hurts my feelings, I used to have a certain style that I loved dressing up to, but now I'm just a normal girl, there's almost nothing left of me that's unique. Maybe I'm being a bit melodramatic, I'm sure there's some uniqueness left but I'm not feeling it right now.
I want to be the old Christie again, I want to have fun, I want to be bold.

Caryatid

J'ai une Idea

As I was reading my AP Lang textbook today it pointed something out about Journaling. It said that Journaling should not just be about what happens throughout your day, it should have a point, or idea about a certain message you want your audience to know. I consider this blog to be like a Journal for me, so reading that made me realize that I've been going about this all wrong.
I need IDEAS for what to write about! My everyday situations must get boring! SHEESH why did I not realize this?? I am not a pleasant writer to read, but I hope to be able to at least keep people interested! I feel as if I lost that ability...Anyway, my idea for today's blog is: Things you say you're going to do, but never actually end up accomplishing them. Like New Year's Resolutions.
Every year I attempt to fulfill a NYR, but it usually never gets done. This year my top two are to start dressing nice again(even in the cold!) and to tone up. SO FAR the two resolutions are unsuccessful. I have the clothes to be pretty again, but I'm just so goddamn lazy..O! Lazy in french = paresseux :P. And I also have the ability to tone up...I'm just still so PARESSUEX!!! How do I overcome this laziness?! And how do I become motivated. I NEED ANSWERS!!!
On the Brightside, the weather's finally warming up...WAIT off topic...DAMN this is difficult. LAZINESS SHOULD NOT CONTROL OUR LIVES. but it still manages to come back to me after that really productive day yesterday T_T.
I'm leaving now :P

Caryatid

Philly

OK, So yesterday I was supposed to go midnight bowling with everyone...but that was canceled due to my Mother because we were to go to Philly today. We did do the 2 hour drive to Philadelphia for Tony Luke's. They do have really good food. But we were there for about 30 minutes...then left XD. We just got back. And I think it was worth it. I like cities for some reason. Mike said that our next trip is going to be to NYC for pizza XD. I really hope we do that! Because while we're up there I wanna visit MMC...and all the shopping <3.
I still need to do my AP Lang assignment. But I cannot bring myself to start working on it! All I've been wanting to do lately is DANCE. There's this party girl in me that really really really wants to come out. I feel really slutty when I say that but it's the truth! >.<
I was talking about Senior week today with my family and it's so exciting! The last time I was on my own in OC was last spring break. And we may be doing that again. Which would be fun! But last spring it was really chilly and rainy and not all that great :P. Hopefully this summer will be better! Beach EVERYDAY :D. WOOP WOOP!
Well I think that's all for now, I wanna start putting other things in my blogger though. Not just what I do during the day...hmmm. Maybe I should be all "Buddha says" again XD. Those were fun times. I used to be all philosophical XD. It was grrrrrrEAT. TATA FOR NOW. Hopefully I can go to England this summer :D That would be really exciting!

Caryatid

The Lovely Bones

Last night Dan and I went to see The Lovely Bones.It was an amazing movie and had me crying most of the time. Crying movies = good movies(because they can get a reaction outta you). It is my new favourite movie ^_^. We went to the Harbor Center to see it because it wasn't playing at Annapolis Mall. So now I know my way around Annapolis a little better! So that's good :).
When I got back to the island we went to Taco Bell, and we waited outside for like 15 minutes because I couldn't decided what I wanted XD. So Dan got angry and made me choose and go through the drive-thru :P. I had this 5 layer burrito thing...it was pretty good. I was kinda disappointed though because my Mom makes this thing that we call "Chicken-in-a-Bag" (that sounds so redneck XD). IT'S SO GOOD. And she said that she was going to make that for Dinner...but she didn't T_T So I had TB.
We went to the Bayside Clubhouse and got the movie Halloween 2. We didn't watch it though XD Because I was scared. So instead we watched All in the Family. i left at like 1:30 am -_- I used to be able to do that...now it's really hard to leave that late, because I feel like I'm going to fall asleep at the wheel :P. It could just be because school is in session and I'm using all my brain-power XD. NEXT SEMESTER COMING UP woop woop!
My classes are: French V, Trig, AP Lit, and AP Lang. Two classes with the Wolff again XD. I need to do that "summer assignment" for the class still -_- I'll try to start it today..but VAMPIRE DIARIES COMES ON TONIGHT!! It's really weird for me to like tv shows this much, but I follow Glee, Gossip Girl, and Vampire Diaries like it depends on my life . I think that's unhealthy.

caryatid

The Weekend

OK we'll start off with Friday: SO in AP Lit we took part of our final exam. I miscalculated the time and did not finish my essay. I was very upset about this because I have never not finished a timed essay! It was horrible :(, but then I came home later that day and found out I was accepted into another college, one i really wanted to go to :) Marymount Manhatten! :D. It's really nice knowing that I have a place to go now, a lot of my stress is gone :). Also Lately I've been feeling like I've gained a lot of chubby :(. it makes me upset, so I'm gonna do something about it. WELL ANYWAY in physics on friday I took another part of my exam, and it was easier than I thought :D. After school I went with Dan to his Dad's in NJ. His family is really nice, so I had a good time :). While we were there we watched Taken and Jennifer's Body. They were rally good movies! I was surprised that I like Jennifer's Body so much.
I can't wait to see Lovely Bones! It came out this weekend so hopefully I can catch it before it leaves!!!! :D schools tomorrow and I need to memorize the rest of my speech and read some more for AP Lit :P. Not too excited for school tomorrow -_-.


caryatid

Accepted

Well today I received my first acceptance letter! It was from Drexel, I also received the Dean's Scholarship so that's awesome! I'm super-excited about everything because it's the first one! And even though there's a slim chance of my going to Drexel, I'm glad I got in :).
Tomorrow are my finals and I'm heading to Dans Dad's with him for the weekend :). I'm nervous about the finals but happy to see Dans family :D. I have half of a physics final and half of an AP Lit final T_T. I need to study but i have yet to do so :P. I'm baking pizza right now though and doing the laundry :P. I'm being productive! Just not in a scholarly way XD. I'm a bit sad that this semesters over because i really liked Speech class with Derrick and Caitlin and everyone else. Also I'm gonna miss Physics a bit. I really like Mr.Mckim he's a sweetheart! Also I don't think I have any classes with Derrick next semester :P SO this STINKS T_T_T_T. But hopefully we have lunch together and see more of each other because of the musical :).
Lately I've been really self-conscious about myself. I feel like i need to start watching what I eat and working out again. Which I do need to do seeing as i don't get much walking time since this winters been so damn cold. I wish i had the clubhouse key so i could go to the clubhouse and run on the treadmill and do the bike thing!! :D haha i'm gonna ask mike for the key :). I also wanna do yoga with Nic soon. I promised him! ^__^
Hopefully I do well on my finals tomorrow, and hopefully Dan's toes get better, and hopefully I get fit and healthy again, and hopefully i get accepted to the rest of the colleges I applied to! ^__^

caryatid

An Empty Shell

Maybe one day I'll write a tidbit about my middle school life. Just to get it out there. I haven't thought about it in a long time, but recently it's starting to come back to me. I don't like the way I was back then, I'm too embarrassed to think or talk about it. SO maybe I'll write it...maybe. I was very stupid back then though. I was stupid, but i had reasons to be. I had no one. I was a complete insecure loser who thought too highly of herself. I know that doesn't make sense put together. But that was exactly who I was.
I don't feel like talking about it today.

caryatid

Remembering Sunday

I'm sitting here, procrastinating :). I don't know why I smile when I say that word...but i do XD. WELL yesterday Derrick and I went to the mall! I went for shoes, Derrick for pants. WELLL haha, I found 3 shirts and 2 skirts XD, and Derrick found a shirt. SO WE FAILED T_T. I did find a good pair of shoes, but they didn't have any left at Sear's. So maybe I can hassle my Mom into getting me a new pair online ( they are much needed, believe me! My other boots have holes in them XD).
Today at school I received my Senior Paper grade. I got an A- on it. I think that's a good grade and all, it's just when Dr.Woolf gave it to me she said, "I felt ambivalent about your paper, Christie." I always feel like Dr.Woolf is holding me up to this higher expectation than everyone else. I think it may be just me, but I think she really does! Maybe it's just the fact I have 3 classes with her and we're BFFS XD jkjk. WHAT DOES AMBIVALENT MEAN?!?!?! T_T_T_T_T. Well I should be getting my final say from Drexel within the week, that's exciting. But I don't think I really want to go to school there. I just applied cause there was no application fee :). I really hope to get into all the other schools I applied to though. I still may apply to two more, I'm thinking about York college and St.John's a lot lately. Maybe I will apply to them ^__^, depends how I'm feeling after finals XD.
Today this boy names Alexsander Landolfi stuck his head in my face, it was really awkward and I looked away, but he was literally like a centimeter away from my face XD. It was so weird! Anyway, practice was horrible! Everyone sounds sad and it's supposed to be a happy song XD. Also the leads aren't that great, they're boring! :P I wish he would just choose different people. That's what he needs to do if he wants this show to be any good :P
Lovely Bones comes out this weekend! But I may be going to Dan's Dad's house this weekend. I love Dan's Dad's family, they're so nice and his little brothers and sister are so cute!!! I can't get over how cute Jackson is, I love him. SORRY DAN YOU HAVE COMPETITION ;D

caryatid

Wake Up in the Morning

I'm feeling like P.DIDDY. Just kidding. I'm actually on weheartit.com and looking up french pictures because I'm feeling a little French today :). I miss my camera. I would really love to put on a pretty outfit and take pictures in the snow today. But, I cannot. Because I did not receive a camera for Christmas and it's been about 2 years since I've had one -_-. I miss doing the little photo-shoots :P.
Well today I will be going over to Helena's to have a girls night! I'm really excited for this because I haven't had a girls night in...about 6 months. So this is much needed :).
O I FORGOT TO SAY! Today is a Snow Day! WOOHOO. Gonna watch Gossip Girl today :D. I'm addicted, yes.
Seeing as it's only the morning I do not have much to say, maybe later in the day I will :P.
O! Last night I was trying to figure out how to change my background to a picture. I just don't know how :P. If anyone knows. Help me?

Caryatid

Chipped Nails

My problem today: chipped nails. All day they kept chipping! All I want is some nice nailpolish that don't chip, and i would love nice nails that don't indent, and i would also love nice soft hands. But we don't get everything we want do we?
Songs stuck in my head today: WE AT DA HOTEL, MOTEL, HOLIDAY INN!!! haha and ONLY THE GOOOOOOOD DIEEEEE YOUNGGGG. It got really bad during physics. All i could say XD
Today I wore this shirt I bought at Second Hand Rose yesterday. It's a boys shirt i think...it fits like a boys. But I put a waist cincher on it to make it more form fitting, and now iz girly! :D
Hopefully we have a snow day tomorrow, or some kind of a delay :P I would really enjoy that extra rest. ALSO I WOULD LOVE IT IF THE WEATHER WAS WARMER. I bought some cute dresses that I can't wear in this godforsaken cold -_-.
Unlike last January and February when I was sad. This January and February actually seems to be looking like it's gonna be fun :D. I'm totally excited for what my future holds! :)

caryatid

Second Hand Rose

Today started out pretty nice. I even had Alexis mention, "You're looking cheerful today!" She's adorable! The fact is I was feeling pretty good. I also still felt awesome when i went shopping with my mother (which is shocking btw). We went to Second Hand Rose, I bought a few shirts and a little surprise for Dan :). We also went to Safeway; as usually the first thing I do when I go there is Starbucks. I ordered a Chai Tea Latte, but they gave me some sort of coffee at first? And I was like WOAH, nu uh I need my chai. So they fixed it and it was yummy, just a tad too milky :P. STILL GOOD. Then I get home and I ask Dan if Sydney has texted him back yet. And he said that she had texted him back but said "Hey"... I was like WTF?! After he sends her a novel she just replies days later with a "Hey". Is she mentally challenged? Really? If she doesn't reply to Dan I will talk to her. Hell I'll probably still talk to her about this even if she does reply to Dan's message. People really piss me off -_-.
OVERALL: still in good mood :). I'm going to take a nice shower to relieve my anger XD.

P.S. THOSE PEARS ARE SO COOL
caryatid

Steamed Dumplings

I have adopted a new love for Chinese food. Having not grown up with the delicious taste as a child it was a sudden PANG when I ate some the other night with Molly and Nic. I realized I LOVE CHINESE FOOD! It's amazing! I cannot believe my Mom has been keeping me from this because of a food poisoning accident :P. But she's always been a worry-wort like that. You learn to live with it.
I've decided that I will write how I actually feel in these blogs, because usually I keep it friendly here incase someone I know sees it...but I'm positive none of my friends even use this anymore XD so WOOHOO free thoughts coming out XD.
Well today I wrote a note to Dan in speech, ranting about how i feel and how things will play out if anything else happens. I think I'm getting my point across this time...
Physics was moderately simple and understandable today...surprisingly, we're learning about magnets. And we're building a motor right now. It's kinda fun. Michelle and I's wooden block broke the first time though XD We learned our lesson. Wrapping the damn wire about the nail took FOREVERRR. lol
Listening to Lady GaGa's new album. I like it. It's different. She has a good voice. And even though she's weird, i love her.
I was reading Just Listen and the main character Annabel reminds me of myself a bit... here's something she said:

a message sank into me: that being nice is the ideal, the one place where people didn't get loud or so quiet they could scare you. If you could just be nice, then you wouldn't have to worry about arguments at all. But being nice wasn't as easy as it seemed, especially when the rest of the world could be so mean.

Nic called me today, I think Bonnie was in the background XD I heard someone else's voice. But they were making plans for Otakon. I'm really excited about this year! I think this one will be the best yet! :D They told me I should go as Vanille from FFXIII but i've only played a few FF games and haven't played the XIII one XD. I still really like her outfit. But I also like Bayonetta's outfit a lot too! Also Dan said I should be the Wendy's girl...I don't know which one is best XD.

caryatid

Hello 2010

I think I've been using this thing for almost a year. That's surprising, i usually don't stick with things that long. Well WOOHOO Graduation year is here! And i've applied to 5 schools thus far :). It feels good, not gonna lie. I think I'll be ready for this. SO far lots of good things have happened in 2010!
My Mom's getting married to Mike on Oct 2nd :D and I might be getting a little green car from my Dad! Which then will allow me to get a job and I'll be having $$$$ :D I was so happy on New Year's at Casey's with everyone. It's nice having a big fun new years with all your friends and you can actually remember it XD. I love Casey's mom, Miss Patty. She is a sweetheart.
But there has been a minor bump in the road although it's only January 3rd -_-. Dan is a major poop head. He's so stupid and idc if he's reading this cause he needs to hear it. He needs to get his act together. He's getting harder to trust...I hate that I feel like I'm not good enough. If this doesn't change, I'm going to change it for us :P I love him so much, and I really hope he keeps his promises. I don't ever wanna feel the same way i felt when he broke up with me last March. And I NEVER EVER wanna feel the way i felt last June. Although it came close the other night -_-. I didn't get as mad as I wanted too. I just want him to know that he has a good thing going for him being with me :/ and that hurting my feelings won't keep me here. I'm sure he knows that though, he just can't keep his penis at bay. I hope someone puts it on a stove XD
Men. are. stupid.
Well, school starts tomorrow and I finished the Joy Luck Club, it was an alright book...not a favourite though :P. I'm gald I read it :)
My New Year's Resolutions: Get a job, Wear pretty clothes again, start working out cause i'm getting lazy :P, learn to cook well :), have a kickass time at Otakon, stop caring about what others think of me, and not getting embarrassed.
OO! I forgot to say that we're going to be moving into a bigger house soon :D I'm excited!

caryatid