bittersweet day

I passed my driving test ^___^
I've decided i'm going to try at being a delegate for SGA...since NHS hates me...
I drove around all by myself today, and with Brittany once, it was awesome.
I felt so grown up
sigh
It really hasn't set in yet...i hope it doesn't at school :/

Today at Bible Study we were talking about prayer, and we each have a prayer buddy...mine was Brittany! XD
So we prayed about everything that we felt, it was awesome.
Some of us cried
i held it in! :D
i've already cried once at bible study...and that was the first night i was there XD

Reading the Bible makes me happy
i finished all of John
My favorite chapter is Ecclesiastes
lol something like that XD
i pronounce em all wrong XD

I love my friends so much
i don't feel lonely when they're around :]
there's a plan for me
:]


caryatid

tree spirits

there's a plan for me
i just have no control over that plan at this moment -_-
something good will happen
hopefully :/

anticipation

Took pictures with Taylor and Veronica today
They turned out nice
Anticipating Monday's outcome
:/
Good thing im a patient person
Test tomorrow
most likely i'll fail
too much on my mind
I've found that counting is a good way to forget everything
when you count, you can only think of the next number coming...
so i've been counting a lot today
math homework was easy
All my midterms are Tuesday
and my drivers retake test :/
i practiced parallel parking today
i did well, i just can't get nervous anymore

caryatid

yodel

I feel lonely:/. So i failed the driving test T_T. I was so upset and i cried...lame. But then my Dad called me and convinced me to not let it bring my day down. And then i realized that i get to retake it XD and fix the mistakes i made today. I don't have to be as nervous next time now because i know what to expect ^___^. And watching Heidi Klum yodel was hilarious XD. So that brightened my day haha. I need to start working on my midterm packet :/. Retaking the driving test Tuesday! woooo XD. I'm watching antm now XD they put snakes on them and they're freaking out XD. Today's going to be a boring day...John's coming today...so i get kicked out of my room again COOOL. -_-. I wanted to see Dan today but he's sick :/. I have a little something for him and a note from Thursday. lame. My back hurts T_T_T_T sooooooo much goddammit.
I need a hobby. I can't drawwww, not musicalll, fail everything...I NEED SOMETHING IM GOOD AT T_T. I'm so tired of failing everything, i want something i can be proud of :/.
I absolutely love Paige Hill :D I'm fersure going back to how i used to be. I felt more confident that way ^__^


Caryatid

Sping is here

I'm slowly taking off all the worry that i've had over the past few months and it feels great :D. Spring is here, and even though it doesn't look too much like Spring outside i'm still feeling it XD. Driving test on Saturday! I'm a bit nervous, i hope i pass ^___^. It would be nice to drive wherever before 12am XD.
I love seeing the trees coming out with all their pretty flowers. Especially the pink ones! Makes me smile ^___^. Once it stops raining i want to go on a walk. Or a bike ride! :D.
Still looking for a job, kinda found one...but i don't wanna work there XD. Buttload of homework lately, midterms next week, fun fun fun. I only have two though ^___^ mythology and math lol, should be easy :D.
I feel really bad about embarrassing Chris in Mythology today. Paige walked by and he stared her down as she walked by...and everyone knows he likes her...even Paige knows XD. So i said "OooOOoOO Chris stop staring down Paige!" jokingly
and he was like "WHAT no no no i wasn't!"
and then Hailee had to make fun of him thee entire time T_T which i didn't plan on...so i'm pretty sure he was ticked at me for saying that...but i asked him for forgivenes and he said he forgave me...but i don't think he's telling the truth...i'll have to find a way to make it up to him :/.
I wish Hailee would stop talking for a little XD. Or maybe i should just watch what i say more :/
Most likely the second one XD

caryatid

selfish

This weekend was GREAT ^__^...not ok, but great. haha. I got to spend it all with Dan and that was nice. But at the Cast Party i got sad. I had no reason to be sad there, but i was sad. Also I got sad today...that ones caused by my mom mostly, but i shouldn't feel like that, that's selfish :P. I just feel like shit, even though i had a good weekend.
I'll write more on thee other blog if you wanna see it
I'm not even gonna put in a picture with this, there's no picture with how i feel today. :/

caryatid

forgiveness

I went to a Bible Study tonight that Erics sister, Cate, leads. It was awesome. The topic was Forgiveness, and we got to talk about how we forgive people, who we've forgiven, and who we need to forgive. There was seven of us there and we all got to answer these three questions and i deffinately learned tonight to never judge a book by its cover. One of the girls there was this girl at our school that isn't really one that i thought i would ever be friends with. She's very obnoxiuos and loud...but as we all went around and talked i felt that i could actually end up becoming this girls friend. I love that feeling, of realization :D. Cate is such a great person to look up to too. I feel like i could talk to her about anything and i've only met her about 3 times XD its really surprising for me to feel that way because i have some hard times letting go of my feelings.
Well once the question of who i need to forgive came to me, it took me a while to think about it. And i realized that even though i want to forgive Dave, i will never be able to unless he confronts me. And i basically told the story of Dave and why i needed to forgive him for everything he's done and i ended up crying. I couldn't stop. This caused everyone else to cry and i felt bad, and we all started laughing. It was great XD. But i'm really glad i got that out. Britt told me she was glad too :].
Then we started talking about Princess weekend and i wish i could go! But i'm going on a College visit that day. The College visit should be fun. Dan is coming with me :D I'm excited :D, i hope it's nice out this weekend :D.
I feel so happy and inspired and i feel like by talking to Cate more i will be able to get that wall down that i put up against myself. And maybe i'll be able to express myself again :]
i hope

caryatid